Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Just like a violin...


God knows what's best for us. He does.

And while I often question why He feels the need to make me endure certain things, all along I know He has a reason.

Every day this week I've spent my entire drive home, crying out to God. I know He called me back home. I know He called me to stay and help care for my parents. I know He gave me this job.

So why is it so difficult?

My heart aches. For what? 

...for the children I teach whose family lives are "less than desirable."

...for the brokenness I see in the families attending my school.

But that's not all. My heart is breaking for more than that. It's breaking for... 

...for Senegal - the country that stole my heart 5 years ago.

...for West Africa dealing with yet another thing further weakening its already weak state.

...for the sickness and suffering my I'm watching my dad deal with.

...for other family members and also friends who are battling life-threatening illnesses.

...for my home country and its decline in morals and goodness.

...for lost family members, friends, and just all the lost, in general.

...for those who pick and choose what they want to believe from the Bible and think that it's ok to do certain things even though the Bible is very clear on the fact that it is not.

And last, but certainly not least...

My heart is breaking because I feel so totally overwhelmed by every one of these reasons listed, and more that I can't even list due to confidentiality requirements. My heart is breaking because I want to fix them all. I want to make things better. I want to make things right. 

I want...

I guess it's like the quote above said. I guess God is stretching my soul, my heart so He can make beautiful "music" come of all this brokenness. 

So I'll wait. And I'll continue to cry out to God and I will give control to Him, the Master Violinist :)

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